wanita muda: umur u brapa?
me: 45
wanita muda: oh.. padanla u knitting.
And this coming from a self professed intelligent and highly educated person. pfft.
In our world, where bigotry and prejudices are rampant, against our lives, our preferences, ada jugak yang think this way.
So i was like, wasn't all that insulted, but can't help but think: ko kuar dari gua mana dik? orang tua je ke yang knit skarang ni?
lihatlah adik cumel ini. siap pakai baju sekolah lagi. does she look like a makcik to you? *sila pakai spek sebelum jawab soklan ku ini*
and then, we have celebrities who knits.
my idol, sarah jessica parker
joey from friends
geri halliwell. Siap knitting pakai bikini ye. seksi ke tak 'makcik' ni?
russell crowe y'all
how to be a sexy knitter. Ms Uma Thurman shows you how.
And my personal favourite:
GEORGE LUCAS ok. George.Lucas. I soo rest my case.
Just in case that isn't enough, the epitome of trend and fashion, Vogue magazine, has a Vogue Knitting magazine as well.
Yes. it's a knitting magazine with knitting patterns all.And the models are sooo vogue sexy ok.
Esh. sangat la makcik makcik knitting ni kans.
And i leave you with a video of tom hanks pranking julia roberts.
Just Because you are hurt Doesn't mean you'll hurt forever. Just Because your heart is broken Doesn't mean you won't heal Just Because the tears kept flowing Doesn't mean it won't stop.
Just Because you feel weak Doesn't mean the strength is gone Just Because it seemed dark Doesn't mean you can't see Just Because you only see yourself alone Doesn't mean there's no one else there.
Just Because you are still here Means you're still surviving Just Because you heart beats Means you can remain strong Just Because you open your eyes Means someone still cares for you
Airmata tak henti mengalir
Namun aku tetap di sini.
Hati dan perasaan kerap terguris
Namun aku tetap setia.
Kata-kata sering menghiris
Namun kebenarannya ku terima.
Kerana kehormatan masih terjaga
Kerana maruah masih terpelihara
Kerana cinta masih ada
Kerana hati masih miliknya.
I'm beginning to really hate my handbag. Really. I mean i truly, deeply love the people who gave it to me. They actually read my mind as i was actually looking for a new sling bag to bring to work. And when i first got it, i really loved it.
That was before the cute little sling thingy turned into a monster that ate eveything i put in it lah kan. I mean, it wasn't really that big a bag eh. My longchamp bag (ko nak la jugak designer name drop kan maria?) is loads bigger kan? My bag is just a simple 2 compartment, 1 zippered small slip in the middle. Not too deep, but it ain't so shallow either. Just nice lah bak kata modern yuppy girls gitu.
Tapi. Ya, ada tapinya.
Amazingly, whatever i put in the bag seems to go missing. Sometimes after awhile, sometimes immediately. The other day I could have sworn I put a my ciggies in it. I mean, i took the pack out, put a lighter in it, and put it back right on top so that when i got to my smoking spot i could, you know, just reach out and take the pack. dah la usually i am in a rush, just to lepas gian orang kata. take a few puffs and then get back in to wherever i was.
but nooooo.
Puas laaaaa ai korek korek the bag all. Non ado. korek bag je dah 10 minit ni. found my wallet, my phone, my sweets, everything else except the ciggies. I had to close the bag, take a deep breath, and do a second korek. BARU JUMPA. right at the bottom lah kan. HOW it got to the bottom when i remembered putting it at the top is totally beyond my comprehension. really. by that time, all i have time for is a few puffs lah kan? keji.
And this would happen to whatever item i was looking for at that particular time. if i was looking for my phone, i would keep finding my ciggies. even that bagak purse pun boleh hilang jugak dalam black hole tu. boleh jumpa sweet wrapper, tiket bas (tapi rm50 tak pernah pulak terjumpa, heran betul) tapi purse tak jumpa. ada logik ka?
I sometimes wonder if there's a mischievous imp living in my bag. so much so that there was one time that i yelled (out of hearing and vision of the public, lest they would think i need to be carted away in a straight jacket) 'bagi balik barang aku boleh tak mangkuk?'
Drama la tu kan.
Or maybe my bag is like that carpet bag that Mary Poppins has you know? the bottomless kind where she used to pull out of sorts of things like armchair, dressing table etc etc? tapi bila ai sumbat all sorts of things in it, not much la you know, like one diet pepsi can, two phones, mini ashtray, 3 packs of ciggies. tak boleh tutup plak. and weighs macam i bawak bongkah emas.
or maybe, just maybe, in a parallel world where there is another me, just as hot and gorgeous and successful (ko kena la jugak promosi diri kan maria??) who has that very same bag, and at that very same time reaches out for her ciggies. lepas tu ter-seluk pulak MY bag in MY world. tu yang asek tak jumpa je my stuff tu. The other me had that very same thought at that very same time, except she was quicker, so she got the good stuff. *enter lagu twilight zone, lagu star wars bagai*
*sigh*.
I'm just gonna go have a ciggy while i reflect this mysterious phenomenon.
Bagiiii laaaa balekkkk lighter akuuuuuu mangkukkkkkkk! *korek2 bag untuk kesekian kalinya*
<cintaberahi> i
<selasih72> hi
<cintaberahi> peng ke les
<selasih72> awek peng
<cintaberahi> u kt mn ni
<selasih72> kat umah peng i la
<selasih72> napa
<cintaberahi> ooo
<cintaberahi> i les
<selasih72> u peng ke girl?
<selasih72> ooo ok
<cintaberahi> peng u mana
<selasih72> ada ni
<selasih72> tgk i chat
<selasih72> napa
<cintaberahi> jom ym
<selasih72> ym tu apa?
<cintaberahi> yahoo messenger
<selasih72> oph
<selasih72> tak tau
<cintaberahi> notebook u ada webcam?
<selasih72> notebook?
<selasih72> i pakai pc
<cintaberahi> ok
<cintaberahi> pc u ada webcam?
<selasih72> tak ada
<cintaberahi> lorrr
<selasih72> kenapa?
<cintaberahi> i nak webcam sex ngn u berdua
<selasih72> sorry
<selasih72> we dont do that
<selasih72> agak gersang u ni ye
<cintaberahi> ok
<cintaberahi> begitula
<selasih72> kesian
<selasih72> sorry not interested
<cintaberahi> xper
<selasih72> sila la cari org lain
<cintaberahi> ok
Chest to chest, Nose to nose, Palm to palm We were always just that close Wrist to wrist, Toe to toe Lips that felt just like the inside of a rose So how come when I reach out my fingers It feels like more than distance between us
In this california king bed, We're ten thousand miles apart I've been california wishing on these stars for your heart for me My california king Eye to eye, Cheek to cheek, Side by side You were sleeping next to me Arm to arm, Dusk to dawn With the curtains drawn And a little last nite on these sheets So how come when I reach out my fingers It seem like more than distance between us
Just when I felt like giving up on us You turned around and gave me one last touch That made everything feel better And even then my eyes got wetter So confused wanna ask you if you love me But I dont wanna seem so weak Maybe I've been california dreaming
It is interesting how, when this song appeared, we both love it. It is interesting how it is actually the story of us. She may not see it that way, but i felt it as soon as i saw the lyrics.
It is indeed the sharing of lives, yet we're so much apart. And it has been going on for awhile. It was me who could not let go. I knew she doesn't feel the same way anymore. I knew that she has moved on, and has left me behind. Yet i persevered. Perhaps because it was comfortable. Perhaps because i thought there was still a shred of love left. Definitely because I love her. I still do.
Oh, I never doubt that there will always be love. But it is not the same kind of love.
Recent events finally prompted me to ask. I was amazingly calm. Amazingly unemotional, then. That was probably why she was able to be more candid, and admitted what i knew all along. I just wanted answers. If she still loves me, she would be hurt, thus I wanted to work it out. If she doesn't, there is no point in me trying to hide from her.
It didn't hit me until a few days later. I saw her sleeping, and i broke down. It is sad to think that what we have all these years have finally ended. True enough, it probably had ended awhile back, but neither one of us wanted to clarify it. We just went on our different lives, together, in the same bed, but our hearts, our minds are on two different planes. But now, i guess we are both certain of where we stand in our lives.
No doubt we still need each other. Me more than her, I believe. Things have not changed much. We are as we are. Despite having no more claims on each other, we are still as we were, still as we have been for several years now. Close friends. No longer intimate, but hearts intertwined nonetheless. We have had very good years together. Despite doing separate things, having separate friends, we would still be connected. And I pray everyday that that will never end.
Perhaps there will be someone else. Perhaps there will be many others. But I don't think I would ever have someone like her. Perhaps I don't need anyone else like her. Because she is who she is, and i love her for who she is. And I don't want her replaced.
Yes. it's a knitting magazine with knitting patterns all.And the models are sooo vogue sexy ok. 